The Importance of Taking your Annual Leave.

When was the last time you genuinely switched off, took a breath and asked yourself whether the life you are living is the life you actually want?

We man spend so much of our lives chasing the next target, meeting deadlines, looking after our families, managing responsibilities and trying to get ahead in our careers. For many men, being busy, available, dependable and always willing to do that little bit extra is something we take pride in.

But somewhere along the way, we can lose sight of something incredibly important: ourselves.

We convince ourselves that we cannot take a break because there is too much to do. We tell ourselves that things will get easier next month, after the next project, after the next promotion or when the business is less busy.

But what if that quieter period never arrives?

What we need to realise is that by constantly putting ourselves last, we are sacrificing our mental health, our relationships and our ability to enjoy the life we are working so hard to build?

This month, I want to talk about the importance of taking a break, using our holidays, taking stock of where we are and recognising that sometimes stepping away is exactly what we need to move forward.

The Irish holiday culture: Why are we so reluctant to take a break?

A recent report by FRS Recruitment makes for interesting reading.

Its 2026 Annual Leave Report, published at the end of October, found that 43% of Irish workers failed to use their full annual leave entitlement. Almost three in ten had at least five days of unused holidays.

Even more concerning, 12% of respondents said they actually lost unused annual leave days.

The figures also reveal that this is not simply a question of people preferring to work. There is a wider conversation to be had about workplace pressures, staffing levels and organisational cultures in Ireland.

Looking back at FRS's research, which surveyed almost 2,000 workers, just over 40% of men had unused annual leave compared with 31% of women. Among the men who had unused leave, almost two-thirds had five or more days remaining.

Why is this happening?

There are several reasons worth considering that affect Men and Women:

• Workplace pressure: People feel they cannot step away because there is simply too much work to do.

• Understaffing: Employees worry that colleagues will have to pick up their responsibilities while they are away.

• Holiday guilt: Some people feel guilty about leaving their teams behind, particularly when they know everyone is already stretched.

• The backlog: There is a fear that the work will simply pile up while they are away, leaving them with an even bigger workload when they return.

• Career anxiety: Some employees worry that being absent means missing opportunities to demonstrate their value, particularly when senior management are around.

• The visibility trap: There is a belief that if you are not in the office, you are not being seen, remembered or considered for the next promotion.

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I find that last point particularly interesting for us Men.

Have we created a workplace culture where people feel they must be physically present, constantly available and permanently connected to prove their commitment?

And if that is the case, what does it say about the organisation?

Is it a problem with employees or company culture?

I think we need to challenge organisations on this.

Annual leave is not a reward for working hard. It is part of the employment relationship and an important opportunity for people to rest and recover.

If employees are consistently afraid to take their holidays because their workload is unmanageable, there is a management problem that needs to be addressed.

If one person's absence causes a department to struggle, perhaps the organisation has a resourcing or succession-planning problem.

If we men believe that taking two weeks away could damage their promotion prospects, we need to take a step back have a conversation and review how leadership look at how talent is recognised and developed.

And if people are expected to answer emails, attend calls and monitor their phones while on annual leave, are they really getting a break?

HR departments and senior management have an important responsibility here.

They should be asking:

• Are employees taking their full annual leave entitlement?

• Are managers actively encouraging people to take time off?

• Are workloads and staffing levels making it possible?

• Is there proper cover when someone is away?

• Are people being contacted unnecessarily during holidays?

• Are employees afraid that taking leave will affect their career progression?

A healthy company culture is not one where everybody works every hour available. It is one where people can perform to a high standard without sacrificing their wellbeing.

A good organisation should be able to function when an employee takes two weeks off. In fact, a good leader should be encouraging it.

This is very important for us men to realise.

What message are our leaders sending?

There have been some interesting examples of senior business leaders discussing their own attitudes towards work and time off.

In March 2026, Marks & Spencer CEO Stuart Machin attracted attention after questioning the language of work-life balance. Speaking at the Business Leader Summit, he said he disliked the idea of leaders going away and becoming completely switched off from their organisations. He also indicated that he would remain in touch with work while away. Obviously, he believes just because he works on holidays everyone else should.

There is nothing wrong with being passionate about your business. Leadership requires commitment, responsibility and sometimes difficult decisions.

But I would ask a different question.

If the CEO cannot switch off, what message does that send to the rest of the organisation? What does that say about the culture they want in their organisation.

For me Leadership behaviour sets the tone for the whole organisation. If senior people demonstrate that being permanently connected is a badge of honour, employees may feel that they need to follow the same example. For us men that is a huge problem because of the way we think about work.

Elon Musk has also spoken publicly about extreme working hours. During the acquisition of Twitter in November 2022, he said his workload had increased from approximately 70–80 hours to around 120 hours a week. That is an extraordinary workload. But we need to be careful not to confuse an individual's extraordinary working pattern with a healthy or sustainable model for everybody else.

Working longer does not automatically mean working better.

We should be careful about creating a culture where exhaustion becomes a measure of success and where the person who sacrifices the most is considered the most committed. I personally know this because of the toxic environments I have worked in and suffered mental exhaustion.

The real benefits of taking a break

There is a substantial body of research supporting the importance of recovery from work.

A particularly interesting 2025 meta-analysis published in the Journal of Applied Psychology, titled I Need a Vacation, examined 32 studies and 256 effect sizes.

The researchers found that holidays had a significant positive effect on employee wellbeing, with benefits lasting longer than some earlier research had suggested.

They also highlighted two particularly beneficial experiences: psychological detachment from work and physical activity.

In simple terms, it is not just about being somewhere different. It is about giving your mind permission to stop thinking about work.

Taking a proper break gives us an opportunity to:

1. Reduce stress and mental exhaustion

Constant pressure keeps our minds occupied. Time away helps us recover from the demands of work and creates space to relax.

2. Improve our perspective

When we are caught up in the daily routine, everything can feel urgent. Stepping away allows us to look at situations differently and consider what really matters.

3. Reconnect with family and friends

How often do we promise ourselves that we will spend more quality time with our families, only to find ourselves answering emails or thinking about tomorrow's meetings?

4. Rediscover interests outside work

We are more than our job titles. Sport, exercise, hobbies, friendships and simply enjoying life are important parts of who we are.

5. Return with renewed energy

A rested mind is better positioned to concentrate, make decisions and approach challenges constructively. Taking a break is not abandoning ambition; it is helping to sustain it.

My own experience: When working hard becomes working too hard

This subject is particularly close to home for me.

When I was working in banking, there were periods when I was working 84-hour weeks.

I was committed to my job, wanted to succeed and took great pride in what I was doing. Like many people, I believed that working hard, putting in the hours and delivering results were simply part of being successful.

But there is a difference between being committed and becoming consumed by your work.

Looking back, I understand much better how mental exhaustion can creep up on you. It does not necessarily happen overnight. It can be a gradual process where the pressure becomes normal, the long hours become routine and you stop recognising just how much you are carrying.

This experience was one of the reasons I wrote my book, The Bulletproof Banker.

The book explores men's mental health and the pressures that can build up when we feel we always have to be strong, successful and in control.

One of the biggest lessons I have taken from my own experience is that we need to recognise when enough is enough.

We cannot keep giving everything to our jobs and expect to have unlimited energy left for ourselves and the people we love.

Sometimes the strongest thing you can do is recognise that you need a break.

Taking stock: Are you happy with where you are?

There is another benefit of stepping away that I think is often overlooked.

A break gives us an opportunity to take stock.

When we are caught up in the routine of everyday life, we rarely stop to consider whether we are actually happy with the direction we are going.

We keep moving because that is what we have always done.

But time away can give us the opportunity to ask ourselves some important questions:

• Am I happy in my current job?

• Is my work taking too much out of me?

• Am I spending enough time with the people who matter?

• Am I looking after my physical and mental health?

• Am I still enjoying what I do?

• What would I change if I had the opportunity?

• What do I want the next 12 months of my life to look like?

These are not questions we men should only ask when something goes wrong.

They are questions we men should ask regularly.

Sometimes taking stock helps us appreciate how far we have come. Sometimes it highlights changes we need to make. And sometimes it reminds us that we have become so focused on achieving the next goal that we have forgotten to enjoy the journey and celebrate success.

So, to all the men reading this -You don't always need a new job, a new challenge or a new goal. Sometimes you need to pause and appreciate where you are.

And don't be afraid to ask for help

There is one more message I particularly want to get across to the lads.

We need to become better at recognising when we are struggling and asking for help.

For many men, admitting that work is getting on top of them can be difficult. We worry about appearing weak, not being able to cope or letting people down.

We convince ourselves that we should be able to manage everything.

But asking for help is not a failure.

If your workload is becoming unmanageable, speak to your manager. If you are struggling with stress, talk to somebody you trust. If you feel constantly exhausted, anxious or overwhelmed, consider speaking to your doctor or a mental health professional.

You don't have to wait until you reach breaking point.

Sometimes a conversation can make a real difference. It might lead to better support at work, a change in priorities, professional help or simply the realisation that you are not dealing with everything on your own.

To all men I stress -Being strong does not mean carrying everything in silence.

Three things I would encourage you to do this November

As we move towards the end of another year, I would encourage you to do three simple things.

1. Book your holidays.

If you have annual leave remaining, make a plan to use it. Don't keep putting it off until work gets quieter. You deserve the time away.

2. Take time to reflect.

Give yourself some space to think about where you are in life and what you want from the next year. Look at your career, relationships, health and personal ambitions.

3. Have the conversation.

If you are struggling, overloaded or feeling mentally exhausted, speak up. Ask for help before the pressure becomes too much.

One final thought

We men spend so much time working towards a better future that sometimes we forget to look after ourselves in the present.

We work hard for the promotion, the salary, the house, the security and the lifestyle. But what is the point of achieving all those things if we are too exhausted to enjoy them? Or the relationship fails and we are left with nothing.

Your job is important. Your career is important. Providing for your family is important.

But so are all us men or as you are reading this YOU.

Taking a break does not mean you have lost your ambition. Taking your holidays does not mean you lack commitment. Asking for help does not mean you are weak.

Sometimes stepping away is exactly what allows you to come back with greater clarity, energy and purpose.

Don't wait until your body or mind forces you to stop. Give yourself permission to take a break. You might just come back better than ever.

Take care of yourselves and look after the lads around you.

Brian KennedyAuthor of The Bulletproof BankerCareer & Mental Health Coach | Motivational Speaker